Wednesday, April 26, 2006

brokeback meat balls and six screws

so the other day i was replacing the post toppers on my new deck because the sped that built it used those gross ugly plastic cheap ones that i hate. so i went to my local home improvement store to buy wood ones instead. i get there and take a plastic one out of my purse and say "can you tell me to find these ..... that don't suck." some kid leads me about 10 miles into the store to where they were kept, i picked out what i wanted and went to the project desk. "how would you go about putting these on?", i ask. the guy looks like i asked him to get down on all fours and bark like a dog. then he turns to ANOTHER CUSTOMER and asks them!! how unprofessional is that? that guy didn't know either. so i ask another guy at the desk.

him - a big nail?

me - maybe a screw would be better........

him - probably

me - predrill so as not to spilt the wood?

him - ummmm yeah that would probably be good.

me - wood glue?

him - ahhhhh good idea.

me - good thing i know what i'm doing.

so then i'm off to find decking screws, not that anyone in this store seemed to have any clue what i meant by that. so i find the one i wanted and i noticed that they also had them in big open boxes underneath so i assumed you could buy as many as you needed instead of buying 100 when i only needed 6. so i take my wood glue, 6 post toppers and 6 screws to the checkout and the girl looks at me in a similar manner as the guy at the project center did. "how much were those screws?" she asks. i know look at her crazy because clearly it's not my job to know that, i don't work there although from what i've seen so far i'm more qualified then any of these freaks. shes calls and price checks 6 screws ......... waiting ......... waiting ......... waiting ............ still no price. finally the manager comes over and tells her to just give me the screws. now what i still wonder is did she give me the screws because her worker was an idiot and or because i looked pathetic trying to buy 6 screws? but here's the thing, if you don't want people doing that don't keep giant open boxes of them available. i'm not buying 100 when i only need 6 for god's sake. what in the world would i need with 100 3 1/2 inch decking screws?

so my grandmother's frriend's husband died a few days ago. nannie decided to make lunch for her and whatever people were at her house with her getting affairs in order. she makes sweet and sour meatballs in a large slow cooker, rice, rolls and a dessert. she asks my grampie to take the food over to them and as he's loading it into the car the slow cooker somehow breaks and he spills meat balls all through nannie's pristine car and all over the driveway. nanniw starts freaking out crying 1) because of the car and 2) because she was supposed to provide lunch for her friend. she is balling so loud that neighbours come racing over thinking grampie had fallen or had a heart attack or was dead. i know at this moment grampie was praying for god to strike him dead though so he wouldn't have to be dealing with all of this. so he's on his hands and knees picking up meat balls and scrubbing out the car as nannie wails and the neighbours console her. i'm sure they were actually thinking she'd finally lost her damn mind. so things are finally almost cleaned up but the meat balls were so hot the melted through the garbage bag and spilt all over the front step and more on the driveway. are you getting a visual yet? my nanniw calls her friend to explained what happened but she's crying SO LOUD that she can't understand her and SHE thinks that something happened to grampie. now keep in mind that this lady just lost her husband and now she's consoling nannie about meatballs. i swear to god!!

i had a good easter weekend, decorated eggs and visited my parents and brothers and stayed for dinner on friday, saturday went shopping for easter dinner (and it was so busy that i wanted to take my own life and i almost got run over by some lady and her cart), sunday andrew had his egg hunt and and was very excited about the whole bunny process, and had dinner. greek lemon chicken, a stuffing thing that i got off kraft kitche's website, broccoli and califlower with cheese sause and chocolate banana tarts with whipped cream. mathias and zane also spent the night and we watched movies.









last night i watched brokeback mountian, the tent scene was a bit abrupt. i was like "i guess they're gonna kiss .. why is he ..... wow ... ok then." no preamble for sure. the spit for lube was a nice touch i thought. man are gay cowboys ever rough. "i may be gay bit i'm still macho!" *punches the other in face." it was a sweet movie, poor guys. :(

tonight i'm watching mr and mrs smith ... i heard it's not a great movie but here's my thought on it ...... it's either a great movie and i love it and brad and angelina were hot OR it was a sucky movie and they're still hot so really it's a win win situation.

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